Oh the Agony!

Lots of stuff going on lately that I could blog about. Lots of passions within me wanting to be voiced on my blog. Lots of 9 month old boy cuteness going on which would be a fun blog post. Well, I don't seem to get around to it very often. It is what it is. I refuse to stress about it.

But here is what I will blog, right now at midnight when I should be in bed. Its agony. I"m the type of girl who, in general, is pretty laid back, but also not. I deal with a fair amount of anxiety, which seems to be getting worse with age. I like to have a general idea of what is in store for my future. I like plans. I have always felt like I don't do very well with adjustments. So I need time. So its just agony not knowing what the future has in store.

Brian and I are seriously considering moving to Columbia (the city, not country.) Fixing up our house (eekk!), packing all our junk away, putting the house on the market, saying a prayer, and crossing our fingers. Searching for a new house, probably increasing the mortgage by way too much (we bought our house 6 years ago and paid under 200k for it so the mortgage is currently pretty darn comfortable.) New town. New friends. New atmosphere.

Why? Because hubby is burned out, bad. (As in, he even had this heart checked out by a cardiologist because of chest pain. The diagnosis- the heart is fine, its the stress that is a problem.) Getting rid of the commute would be one form of stress relief. He has been doing this commute for 7 years. It is getting old. Plus, his job is probably moving their building just a little bit further away. Longer commute. Also, a new job might be in the works. Being closer to Columbia gives him the most job opportunities. Its just a fact that is where the general area where the jobs are for his line of work. The housing market is still doing pretty terrible down there right now but the market up here is doing a bit better. So it would be a good time to move that way while the prices are low (7 years ago we could not afford a house down there! It was a very expensive housing market back then.)

Upsides? I can get a bigger house, finally! Brian will be home more and less stressed, so a happier family. There are a lot of social groups in that area that will work for me (like more homeschool groups and activities.)  Lots of awesome restaurants in the area.

Downsides? Its a busy area. I think this is my #1 long term worry. I love the area we live at now. I love my neighborhood and how there is some character and space to it (can we say "Cookie Cutter Communities" down in Columbia??) I hate rocking the boat financially, I just don't do that very well. And getting our house ready to sell- oh my what work! We have many things which would need fixing up. (Because its easy to live with something when its your house but others have higher expectations.) And painting. I really dread that. My friends...I will really miss them. Sure, we can come visit, but I wonder how long that will last? My family... my parents won't be so close. That will be a downside for me and the kids! And I really just dread fixing up our house and painting (I think I mentioned that.) And we will be moving away from the country- not that we really live in the country. But the country is not that far away here. Its not that hard to find a bit of nature to play in.

So...who knows? Its a viable option we have to really consider. If we go for it I"m not sure how fast or slow we will be. I guess only time will tell.